Saturday, June 09, 2007

Scorpions, you have crossed the line

Guess what I found in a box of clothes in the baby's room yesterday. A $50 bill! No, kidding. It's not that kind of house. Any guesses what I actually found, about three feet away from the baby's crib? Yeah. A scorpion.

For new readers or hopelessly optimistic longtime readers, I should clarify that, unfortunately, I am not referring here to the glamrock band who rocked us all like a hurricane with their 1984 album Love at First Sting. As terrible as that would be, I'm talking about the real, pincer- and stinger-having, hiding-in-shoes, getting-wrapped-up-in-sheets-at-night arachnids.


I mentioned here and here that I strongly prefer that my bedroom be a scorpion-free zone. I have been, you might say, "distressed" about seeing scorpions in my bathroom and bedroom. But when I see them in my baby's room, right by her crib, it's time to get medieval on some scorpion a**. The exterminators are coming next week, and I want them to be tearing down walls and ripping up foundation and just dumping chemicals everywhere.

Meanwhile, my husband and I have become a sort of scorpion factoid clearing house, with coworkers and friends and blog readers regaling us with their favorite scorpion trivia and offering tales of being stung. Every time I learn something new about these things it gets worse. For example, my husband was telling his assistant that one of the ones we saw wasn't all that big, which was refreshing. The assistant pointed out that that was most likely a baby, which means they're hatching in our house.

Also, well-meaning people keep trying to reassure me by telling me things that only serve to horrify me further. One popular tidbit is that scorpion stings are no worse than wasp stings. I AM TERRIFIED OF WASPS, so this information is not helpful. My mom told me that scorpions fluoresce under blacklight, so I should get one to try to find them at night. Umm...does the thought of turning off all the lights in my house and using a blacklight to illuminate a bunch of GLOWING SCORPIONS IN MY HOUSE not sound just a little too mind-bogglingly creepy to think about?! And, as I type this, I am on the phone with my dad who is telling me the story about how my grandfather (who lives a few miles from here) got one wrapped up in his pajamas while he slept. But, my dad assured me, he only got stung a few times and it really wasn't any worse than a wasp sting. Whew!

On the bright side, I have discovered an incredibly effective way to get your mother to insist on paying for the best pest control service in town to come to the house and give you their Platinum Package. When going out to dinner with your husband and leaving the kids with her, just say this, as I did last night:

"I left clean diapers and jammies in the bathroom for after bath. The baby has already eaten but DB still needs dinner. Hmm...am I forgetting anything? Oh, yeah, be sure to check the baby's crib for scorpions before you put her in. Thanks! We'll be back in a couple hours."


I promise that one day I will resume regular content and stop writing about scorpions. (Although that may require setting up a separate Scorpions in My House blog since I cannot seem to stop talking about it). Meanwhile, check out all these awesome links.

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11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

girlfriend, if i had scorpions in my babies rooms, that's all i would be able to think about!! you go right on telling us all about it. that's why i keep coming back... to make sure none of yours have been stung... praying for ya'll.
cordelia

June 09, 2007 12:04 PM  
Blogger Robert said...

There are some things you can do in anticipation of the exterminators coming, to make your house less hospitable to scorpions. (I got these from Wikipedia, but they all seem sensible.)

Oh, and it's worth noting in the meantime: scorpions hate the light. Burn a few bucks in electricity this week leaving the house well-lit even at night, and you might seriously reduce the chance of seeing one of the little devils.

From Wikipedia:

Scorpions are difficult to control with pesticides alone. Therefore, the first control strategy is to modify the area surrounding a house.

* Remove all trash, logs, boards, stones, bricks and other objects from around the home.
* Keep grass closely mowed near the home. Prune bushes and overhanging tree branches away from the house. Tree branches can provide a path to the roof for scorpions.
* Store garbage containers in a frame that allows them to rest above ground level.
* Never bring firewood inside the house unless it is placed directly on the fire.
* Install weather-stripping around loose fitting doors and windows.
* Plug weep holes in brick veneer homes with steel wool, pieces of nylon scouring pad or small squares of screen wire.
* Caulk around roof eaves, pipes and any other cracks into the home.
* Keep window screens in good repair. Make sure they fit tightly in the window frame.

Wettable powder formulations provide better residual control for crawling pests when applying perimeter sprays. When using pyrethroids or other insecticides labeled for scorpion control, be sure to use the highest permissible label rate.

Apply pesticides around the foundation of the building and up to 1 foot above ground level on the exterior walls. Also apply pesticides around doors, window eaves and other potential points of entry. Cyfluthrin, bifenthrin, deltamethrin, and bendiocarb are effective pesticides.

June 09, 2007 12:51 PM  
Blogger Darwin said...

You could always take the gangsta approach to getting rid of the scorpions: The next scorpion you find, cut off his stinger with a larger pair of pruning clippers. Then tell him severely: "Go back and tell all your friends what we do to your kind around here."

After that, squash the scorpion dead, because he doesn't speak English and has no idea what you just said.

But don't you feel better after getting that out of your system?

June 09, 2007 1:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've never encountered a scorpion, but the father of a friend of mine (in Dallas) was bitten by one and his screams could be heard three blocks away.

I have been stung by wasps a few times - it hurts like hell, and it continues to hurt for several days. Take no comfort in the "no worse than a wasp sting" offerings.

June 09, 2007 10:32 PM  
Blogger Seeker said...

Yuk! Am so glad we don't have scorpions in the UK!

June 10, 2007 8:33 AM  
Blogger beez said...

This may be kind of twisted and wrong, Jen, but I am really enjoying your scorpion posts. I sympathize with your position, but, let's face it, the graphics are great and there is enough humor in these posts that, frankly, you remind me of Dave Barry.

Maybe you should contact the Miami Herald, since he's not writing new columns any more. Maybe scorpions have proven your potential as a real humorist?

June 11, 2007 8:28 AM  
Blogger Jennifer F. said...

Darwin - I am about there. Even if the scorpions didn't fully appreciate the threat, it would be very therapeutic for me.

Beez - Funny, my husband said the same thing. He said he thinks that maybe I was put on this earth to write about scorpions in my house. I could seriously write five posts per day about it. I've actually been restraining myself. :)

June 11, 2007 9:11 AM  
Blogger Jennifer F. said...

Oh! And, Robert, thanks for the research!

June 11, 2007 9:12 AM  
Blogger Theocoid said...

My sympathies, Jennifer. We hve scorpions here in Idaho, but they're further south of Boise than I live. However, we do have brown reculse, hobos, and black-widows. Fortunately, they don't seem to be as pervasive as your arachnids.

June 11, 2007 11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey I am listening to you now on Lino's show on the Catholic Channel. You're a great interview to listen to on the radio. I really would like to see pictures of a glow in the dark scorpion. You should do that and post pictures on your blog.

June 14, 2007 4:23 PM  
Anonymous Renee' said...

i just found this site because i was loking for ways to get the little bastards out of my house too. My two year old daughter has been stung twice and myself once...and yes it hurts! i cant sleep at night because im watching the baby monitor(video) in case something happens or im watching the walls for crawling scorpions... havent found any pestisides that work. I love my house (only been here six months) but now im ready to move!! ~temple, texas

June 17, 2007 5:39 PM  

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I'm 31, have been married for four years, and have three children: a 3-year-old boy, 1-year-old girl, and a baby girl born in August 2007.

Name: Jennifer F.
Location: United States

When I was 26, I had never once believed in God, not even as a child. I was a content atheist and thought it was simply obvious that God did not exist. I thought that religion and reason were incompatible, and was baffled by why anyone would believe in God (I actually suspected that few people really did). After a few years in the Bible Belt, I became vocally anti-Christian. Imagine my surprise to find myself today, just three years later, a practicing Catholic who loves her faith (my husband and I both entered the Church at Easter Vigil 2007). This is the chronicle of my journey.




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