Recommended reading for Lent
Ash Wednesday is just around the corner (March 9), so I wanted to share my suggestions for great Lenten reads, and get your suggestions as well.
Also, based on some emails I’ve been getting with questions about Lent, I wanted to say: If you’re considering observing Lent but aren’t familiar with it, I strongly encourage you to go ahead and do so! If you’re not sure where to start, just give up some small thing that you like (e.g. listening to the radio on the way to work, sugar in your coffee, a certain TV show, etc.) and try to do a little more praying. You can find out more here at Marcel LeJueune’s excellent “All About Lent” post.
I first observed Lent a few years ago, before I was Catholic or Christian — in fact, I wasn’t even sure I believed in God! — and it was a very transforming experience. I hadn’t read up on any of the theology behind it. I just heard people on Catholic radio talking about how they were giving something up, so I decided to give up something too (a food item I enjoyed). The impact of that tiny “fast,” along with trying to read more spiritual books, ended up leading to more spiritual growth than I could have imagined.
Anyway, without further ado, here is my recommended reading list:
To Know Christ Jesus by F.J. Sheed
No other book has brought the Gospels alive for me like this one. Sheed offers all sorts of interesting thoughts on the life of Christ, without veering into unfounded speculation. He mines the Scriptures and comes up with gems that I’d never seen before. It is a bit dense (I almost gave up on it about 40 pages into it), but it really picks up around page 50. If you can stick with it, you’ll be richly rewarded.
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10 Prayers God Always Says Yes To by Anthony DeStefano
This slim little book is packed with all sorts of interesting thoughts about what God’s will is for you, and how to grow closer to God in times in silence. I found it to be particularly helpful in the discussion of the age-old “Why does God allow bad things to happen?” question. This is the perfect read if you’ve been feeling angry with God, wondering why he’s silent, feeling like he hasn’t been answering your prayers, etc. (I first discovered it through this recommendation from a mother whose only child was murdered in the Virginia Tech shootings.)
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He Leadeth Me by Walter Ciszek
This stunning autobiographical account of Fr. Ciszek’s wrongful imprisonment in Russia is one of the most life-changing books I’ve ever read. I read it more than a year ago and yet I still find myself thinking about it almost daily.
What was most surprising to me was how applicable the lessons he learned are to modern American life. His insights about everything from suffering to discerning God’s will to trusting God in all things — which he learned the hard way during five years of brutal solitary confinement and fifteen years in a Siberian death camp — are amazingly inspiring, whether you’re experiencing great suffering or just feeling numbed by the daily grind. I particularly loved his thoughts on how to maintain a lively spiritual life even when life feels mundane or boring. I highly, highly recommend this book.
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Journey to Easter by Pope Benedict XVI
Based on a Lenten retreat he gave for John Paul II in the 1980′s (hosting a retreat to help John Paul II grow in faith — how’s that for pressure?!), Pope Benedict XVI walks us through a series of meditations based on Scripture readings for Lent. I admit that there were two or three chapters that were just way over my head, but the rest of the book offered powerful insights on everything from prayer to the Paschal mystery to conversion to the Church. I find myself going back to this book over and over again for inspiration. An excellent read for Lent.
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Introduction to the Devout Life by Francis de Sales
When I first read the 17th century classic Introduction to the Devout Life, I didn’t feel like I got that much out of it. When I reached the last chapter I felt like I’d enjoyed reading it but couldn’t point to anything specific I’d taken away from it. Then I picked it up off my desk one day and, as I flipped through and re-read the various passages I’d starred and highlighted, I realized just how much I really had taken away from this book.
Now that I’ve gone through it again, I count it among the best books I’ve ever read. It’s the ultimate how-to manual for conforming yourself to Christ. Also, perhaps because the books is based on de Sales’ letters of spiritual direction to his sister and other women who wanted to grow in faith, I find that his advice perfectly fits the things I struggle with on a day to day basis as a wife and mother. Just know that you may have to read it more than once to have the lessons really sink in.
Also, you can download it to your iPhone here (thanks to Melanie for that tip!)
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Finding God’s Will for You by Francis de Sales
How do we know what God wants us to do? Should we try to discern God’s will even for little decisions like what to eat for dinner? What if we pray and it seems like God is telling us nothing at all? These were the questions I had when I decided to get a copy of this book. I found good answers to those questions and a whole lot more: the book has lots of practical advice for daily living that you can start applying to your life right now. It’s also a little bit less dense and more readable than Introduction to the Devout Life.
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What are your recommendations for Lenten reading?
Three secular books for the Christian spiritual life
Recently I’ve come across a few books that I picked up just for fun but that ended up having a very positive impact on my spiritual life. In general, I prefer to read books for Christians and by Christians if my aim is spiritual growth. However, these three books taught me valuable lessons that I hadn’t seen covered (or, at least, not covered in quite the same way) in the Christian market. Since each of them has had a lasting, positive impact on my spiritual life, I thought I’d share.
The War of Art by Steven Pressfield
This is a powerful book. It’s a field guide to spiritual warfare, written by bestselling author Steven Pressfield (The Legend of Bagger Vance, Gates of Fire). In it Pressfield lays out everything he’s learned about fighting what he calls Resistance, that mysterious force that tries to prevent you from creating anything great (which Christians would call the Devil). Pressfield points out that whether you’re trying to craft the Great American Novel, start a business, or simply begin a new exercise routine, “any act that any act that rejects immediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity…[will] elicit Resistance. He starts by describing what it feels like:
A low-grade misery pervades everything. We’re bored, we’re restless. We can’t get no satisfaction. There’s guilt but we can’t put our finger on the source. We want to go back to bed; we want to get up and party. We feel unloved and unlovable. We’re disgusted. We hate our lives. We hate ourselves.
Unalleviated, Resistance mounts to a pitch that becomes unendurable. At this point vices kick in. Dope, adultery, web surfing.
Pressfield emphasizes the importance of work. Just do it. No excuses. Once you’ve discerned what you’re called to do, stay focused on getting the job done. Resistance is a powerful, cunning force, and you’d be a fool to mess around with it. Referring to someone who’s committed to overcoming Resistance as a “professional,” he writes:
The professional…respects Resistance. He knows that if he caves in today, no matter how plausible the pretext, he’ll be twice as likely to cave in tomorrow. The professional knows that Resistance is like a telemarketer; if you so much as say hello, you’re finished. The pro doesn’t even pick up the phone. He stays at work.
He then offers a wealth of practical tips, such as this one on taking criticism:
The professional cannot allow the actions of others to define his reality. Tomorrow morning the critic will be gone, but the writer will still be there facing the blank page. Nothing matters but that he keep working. Short of a family crisis or the outbreak of World War III, the professional shows up, ready to serve the gods.
Remember, Resistance wants us to cede our sovereignty to others. It wants us to stake our self-worth, our identity, our reason-for-being, on the response of others to our work. Resistance knows we can’t take this. No one can.
In the end of the book, he muses about the source of the inspiration for all great endeavors. “Clearly some intelligence is at work, independent of our conscious mind and yet in alliance with it, processing our material for us and alongside us,” he writes. “This is why artists are modest. They know they’re not doing the work; they’re just taking dictation.”
Needless to say, as a Catholic, I saw a few parts where I thought Pressfield missed the mark. I kept thinking that I’d love to sit down over a cup of coffee and tell him all that I’d learned about the role of grace and the power of Christ in the spiritual life — I couldn’t help but think that he’d find that it jibed amazingly well with what he’s experienced in his battles against Resistance. All in all, though, this book is fantastic. It is an absolute must-read.
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Improv Wisdom by Patricia Ryan Madson
I actually discovered this book through Steven Pressfield’s excellent blog, and I’m so glad I did. I read the slim little volume over one weekend, and it really inspired me to make some positive changes in my life. Madson is a theater professor at Stanford, and shares what she’s learned from her decades as a teacher of (and participant in) improvisational acting.
In one chapter, for example, she talks about how important saying “yes” is in the improv world — if you’re up on stage and your acting partner starts taking the show in a new direction, it’ll ruin the whole thing if you fold your arms and refuse to go along with it. Applying that to life, she writes:
Saying yes (and following through with support) prevents you from committing a cardinal sin — blocking. Blocking comes in many forms; it is a way of trying to control the situation rather than accepting it. We block when we say no, when we have a better idea, when we change the subject, when we correct the speaker, when we fail to listen, or when we simply ignore the situation. The critic in us wakes up and runs the show. Saying no is the most common way we attempt to control the future. [...]
The spirit of improvising is embodied in the notion of “yes and.” Agreement begins the process.
(Was any one else reminded of Ann Voskamp’s year of Yes?) At the end of each chapter Madson offers practical exercises for putting these ideas into practice. I loved the one at the end of the Say Yes chapter:
Support someone else’s dreams. Pick a person (your spouse, child, boss), and, for one week, agree with all of her ideas. Find something right about everything he says or does. Look for every opportunity to offer support consider her convenience and time preferences ahead of her own. Give him the spotlight. Notice the results.
The book is full of gems like this one. I found it to be a great source of inspiration to work on paying attention to the present moment, cooperating with others, and, ultimately, trusting in the Holy Spirit to work stuff out when we let go of control. Like with Pressfield, there were moments where I thought that her advice could be even more powerful if she know about the work of grace, the Holy Spirit, the power of Christ, etc. But, overall, I think Madson hit the ball out of the park with this book.
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Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi
The author of Never Eat Alone is a dear friend of ours, so it’s hard for me to separate what I learned from the book from what he’s taught me in person. Keith is a master at networking, and his view of building social networks and involving other people in your projects has had a huge impact on the way I see the world. The three biggest principles I’ve taken from him, which he details in Never Eat Alone, are:
- When you discern something you’re supposed to do, think of the path to get there in terms of other people: As a typical American, when I used to set out to accomplish something, I’d think of it in very isolationist terms: I am going to do this all by myself. Keith encouraged me to involve other people in my projects, to look around and see whom I know who might enjoy helping me through this process. Since my conversion, this advice has really helped me embrace being part of the Body of Christ, all of us working together to support one another.
- Don’t hoard your personal connections: Too often, when people know someone who might be able to help someone else, they hesitate to put the two people in touch — especially if the person whom they’re asking for a favor is in a position of power. “I don’t want to bother Mr. Important,” the thinking goes. “I need to save my connection with him for a time when I really need it!” Keith’s view is that building a social network and getting to know people isn’t about hoarding impersonal connections so that you can amass more power for yourself — it’s all about generosity, and getting to know people on a personal level. Be generous with your Rolodex, and everyone will benefit.
- Don’t be afraid to connect with people who seem “out of your league”: Over the past couple of years I’ve had wonderful conversations with a few well-known authors (one of whom had recently been on Oprah), simply because I emailed them and asked if they’d mind sharing their wisdom with me. I saw each of these folks as way out of my league, but, thanks to what I’ve learned from Keith, I decided to go ahead and give it a shot — after all, the worst case scenario is that they’d say “no.” In these conversations I was able to get some excellent advice about my book, as well as to offer these authors encouragement in their own work. In the end, I think we both benefitted.
Never Eat Alone is written for ambitious business professionals, and the specific advice Keith gives often makes me feel like I need to go take a nap — the fast-paced way he lives his own life is way more than I could ever take on. However, underneath it all are solid principles for breaking out of an isolationist mentality and learning to involve other people in your life and your dreams. Definitely worth a read.
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What about you? Have you found any surprising gems that helped you in your spiritual life?
Book chat: books about prayer, faith, writing and being lost at sea
It’s been way too long since we’ve talked about books! Here are six books I’ve read recently:
1. Adventures in Daily Prayer: Experiencing the Power of God’s Love by Bert Ghezzi
This new book by Bert Ghezzi is a delight. I’ve been a fan of his for a while (his books The Heart of a Saint and Breakfast With Benedict are favorites), so it was great to see something a bit more personal from him. In this part memoir, part how-to format, Ghezzi gives us an intimate glimpse inside his prayer life, then takes a step back to consider what he’s learned, and offer suggestions for how we can apply these lessons to our own lives.
It was refreshing to hear such a respected author admit that he was so devastated after failing a master’s exam that he fell into a deep depression and stopped praying for almost a year, or that he’s experienced times of spiritual dryness. That kind of candor mixed with concrete lessons that I could apply to my own life made this book a spiritual breath of fresh air. I highly recommend it.
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2. 10 Prayers God Always Says Yes To by Anthony Destefano
I actually read this book over a year ago, but since I never did a review I wanted to include it in this list since it’s been so influential for me. I discovered 10 Prayers after reading this gripping endorsement from a mother whose only child was murdered in the Virginia Tech shootings. I bought it based on her recommendation, and, sure enough, it transformed the way I see view prayer and God’s will. In particular, it helped me understand the age-old question of “Why does God let bad things happen?” Ever since I read this book I’ve felt less need to fixate on the “Why?” aspect of bad situations, and ask instead, “How is God going to bring good out of this?”
DeStefano writes in a tone that assumes the reader believes in God, so this isn’t a book I’d recommend to someone who’s having fundamental doubts about God’s existence. However, it is an excellent book for anyone who believes but feels like God is silent or distant.
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3. Adrift: Seventy-Six Days Lost at Sea by Steven Callahan
Wow. This is one wild read. It’s the true story of a man who was shipwrecked just a couple days into a solo transatlantic journey, and how he went on to cross the Atlantic by himself in a life raft. It is definitely a page-turner, and I learned a lot. Like, say, it made me realize that I have no interest in sailing across the Atlantic by myself. It made me realize I don’t have a very strong will to live (I would have rolled over and died on page forty). It made me realize that, no matter how bad my day is, I can always be thankful that at least I’m not stuck on a raft in the middle of the ocean with the awareness that at any moment a Great White shark could come up from the abyss and swallow me whole.
Anyway, you’ll find this book informative and riveting. My only caveat is that I found his agnostic outlook, devoid of any transcendent meaning for this experience or his life in general, kind of depressing; in the end, I felt vaguely sad for him, even though he did survive this incredible ordeal.
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4. Perfect Recipes for Having People Over by Pam Anderson
I love to have friends over. I kind of like to cook. But when you combine the two, I usually end up a half step away from a nervous breakdown. I’ve realized that the problem is that I am just not wired for cooking while socializing. (You know how those guys on Top Chef can sautee this and stir that and throw something in the oven and whirl around and chop something, all while carrying on a conversation? Whatever part of the brain it is that facilitates that kind of cross-activity multitasking, I do not have it.)
So anyway, I realized that the key is for me to find dishes that I can make ahead of time, so that I have only minimal hands-on cooking to do after my guests arrive. Enter Pam Anderson’s book. (The author not to be confused with the Baywatch star of the same name.) Though some of the meals were a bit pricey for our budget, it still gave me tons of good ideas. Most of her recipes can be made ahead, and she includes all sorts of tips in each recipe that show that she has actually made this for friends in her own home (e.g. making rectangular pizza dough so you can fit more than one on the bottom rack at once). Combine it with mouth-wateringly beautiful pictures, and this is just the book I was looking for.
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5. Word Painting: A Guide to Write More Descriptively by Rebecca McClanahan
Writing descriptively is not something that comes naturally to me; I tend to focus more ideas than really bringing the reader into a specific moment in time, so Word Painting is just the book I needed. Thanks to McClanahan, I was able to see how to liven up my descriptions without bogging down my prose with a bunch of unnecessary words. I loved what she had to say about the importance of describing characters in motion, and I thought it was great advice when she suggested that writers focus on one detail to deal with overwhelming topics (e.g. she shares the story of a student who wrote a powerful poem about grief by describing the moment she sewed a button on her deceased father’s jacket). This book needs to be on every writer’s bookshelf.
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I’ll throw in another writing book, just for fun:
6. Flogging the Quill: Crafting a Novel that Sells by Ray Rhamey
I almost didn’t buy blogger and editor Ray Rhamey‘s book because I had that typical consumer’s bias against self-published books, but I’m so glad I didn’t skip it. Probably more than any other book I’ve read on writing (and I’ve read a lot), this one made me feel like I could truly get inside an editor’s head. Most helpful were the pages at the end where Rhamey reprints actual first pages from submitted books. He first asks you, the reader, to consider whether you’d turn the page if you were to come across this book. Then he shows the pages again, this time with his edits. Having that “hands-on” practice helped me understand these concepts much better than if he’d simply lectured about them. If you’ve ever considered writing a novel, memoir, or any narrative prose, you need to read this.
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What about you? What are you reading these days? Read anything particularly noteworthy lately?
Book chat: Books about faith and food
It’s been way too long since we’ve talked about books! Here are some thoughts on what I’ve been reading lately…
The Rosary: Keeping Company with Jesus and Mary by Karen Edmisten
When a former atheist writes a book about the rosary, you know it’s going to have some fresh perspectives. I’ve been following Karen Edmisten’s blog for a long time, so I was excited to read this book. I nodded and laughed at this tale she tells of her early efforts at praying the rosary:
In his explanation of the rosary, a friend had casually said, “Announce the first mystery.” I nodded to mask my confusion, but later dug up some instructions on the rosary to clarify. They said the same thing. So now I had to know what it meant to “announce” a mystery. Did I have to say something out loud? Was I announcing something to God? Was I supposed to pray the rosary only with other people, when things could be announced?
Boy, could I relate to that! From there Edmisten goes on to tell how she got past her fixations on doing it “right” to appreciating the beauty of this form of prayer. She also clears up common misconceptions (praying “to” Mary, vain repetition, etc.) and offers some beautiful reflections and Bible verses for each mystery. I think my favorite part, however, was how upfront she is about the difficulties that many of us face making any kind of prayer — the rosary in particular — part of our daily lives. I perked up at the first paragraph of Chapter 9 when she writes:
Now that we’ve explored every other aspect of the rosary, let’s ask the real question: How do we put this into action for more than a week? It’s a question every serious Christian faces, no matter what the form of prayer is. It’s the question of a realist. We have the noblest of intentions. We mean to go to God every day, to give ourselves to him twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. But we routinely fall down on the job. How then do we make it happen for real?
Her unflinchingly honest and practical advice on this subject is invaluable for any Christian who wants to pray more, whether it involves the rosary or not. At only 84 pages this slim little book is a quick, delightful read that is sure to leave you more enthusiastic about all forms of prayer, especially the rosary.
The Shadow of His Wings by Gereon Goldmann
Just buy this book. Right now. Click through the link to Amazon, hit Add to Cart, and make yourself a note to thank me later. Dawn of Natural Design recommended it to me in the comments to my last book post, and I’ve meant to thank her profusely ever since.
This true story of a young man in 1940′s Germany whose dream to be a priest was derailed when he was drafted into the Nazi army is one of the most interesting books I’ve ever read. The stories of how Fr. Goldmann trusted in divine Providence, even when it seemed insane, will leave your mouth hanging open in awe as you read; if this book doesn’t inspire you to trust in God, I don’t know what will. To give you an idea of how good it is: it was my current reading when the baby was born back in March, and I was so into it that I didn’t mind waking up for feedings in the middle of the night because I could click on my book light and get back to reading. Did you hear that? DIDN’T MIND BEING WOKEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. BECAUSE OF THIS BOOK. Like I said, just buy it.
My only criticism would be that the epilogue is a little long. While it is interesting, it goes in a totally different direction than the first part of the book, so that’s kind of jarring. And one other thing: do not read the captions under the pictures — they often give away what happens next in the book! For example, you’ll be immersed in some intense scene, almost sweating with tension as you wonder if he’ll make it across enemy lines, and then you’ll glance at a picture and read the caption which says, “Goldmann with friends after he made it across enemy lines.” Argh!
Other than that it is pure awesomeness. Buy it now.
The Duggars: 20 and Counting! by Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar
I was surprised by how much I liked this book. It’s a combination memoir and advice book, and I enjoyed almost every page of it. Interestingly, I was wading through Jean Pierre de Caussade’s classic Abandonment to Divine Providence at the same time as I read this one, and I found that they complemented each other nicely.
The memoir part of the book offers one story after another of how God worked in their lives when they were obedient to whatever they thought he was calling them to do, even when it seemed crazy. For example, Jim Bob writes of spending $110,000 of their own money on a failed Senate bid, saying, “Strangely…we both continued to feel the same strong sense of peace about the spent money and the failed effort. There was no remorse because we knew we had done what we believed God wanted us to do.” I also loved how they gave specific numbers for many of their big financial decisions — it was interesting to get a glimpse into their financial lives in such detail.
The second part of the book has some great practical tips for how they manage the chaos of day-to-day life with their then-18 children. I think the thing that impressed me most, however, was simply their tone. Anyone who’s read many internet discussions about them knows that some people seethe with hatred at the mere mention of their names, and there have been many unkind things said about them. And yet from the tone of the book you’d think that nobody had ever offered them anything but words of love and blessings; they are not defensive or critical of others, and focus on showing the good that God has done in their lives rather than criticism or telling other people what they should do. A lovely read.
Real Food: What to Eat and Why by Nina Planck
I’m a sucker for books about food and nutrition, so it’s no surprise that I liked this one. Planck has a particularly interesting perspective because she is the daughter of well-educated parents who voluntarily left the rat race to start a farm. She grew up on the farm but then rejected her parents was of eating for a vegan then vegetarian lifestyle, writing:
In her sentimental book, Diet for a Small Planet, Frances Moore Lappe argued that modern beef farming was ecologically unsound (it wrecks natural habitats), politically unjust (you could feed more people on the grain cattle ate than on the steaks), and nutritionally unnecessary (we don’t need all that protein. The idea that a vegetarian diet was healthier clinched it for me, and I became vegan in high school. It was perhaps my only act of rebellion against my stubbornly tolerant parents.
Planck then chronicles how eating became an intellectual endeavor more than anything else, and she learned to mistrust her body’s instincts about what to eat. The results?
As for my health, I felt terrible. My digestion was poor, and I was moody, tearful, and tender in all the wrong places before I got my period. In cold and flu season, I got both. I was depressed, too. Partly to stave off gloom, I ran three to six miles a day. On this virtuous regime I also gained weight steadily…Back on the farm in Wheatland, meanwhile, my omnivorous parents were the healthiest people I knew, lean and cheerful as they tucked into friend eggs and pork chops. Something was wrong with me, but I certainly didn’t suspect it was my diet.
For the rest of the book she lays out her own research and personal experiences that led her back to her parents’ way of eating, as well as founding London’s first farmer’s market. Her tone throughout the book is friendly and calm; it reads like a light memoir about food rather than the heavy-handed manifestos that are so common in this genre. A great read for anyone who wants to feel inspired about healthy eating the old-fashioned way.
Lick the Sugar Habit by Nancy Appleton, PhD
Speaking of books that read more like manifestos than light memoirs…this would be one of them. Appleton was motivated to write this book after seeing the tremendous impact it had on her life when she eliminated refined sugar from her diet. All her life she’d been chronically ill with long bouts of pneumonia as well as frequent headaches, colds, flus and fatigue, all the while making sundaes, large amounts of chocolate and other sugary treats a big part of her life. When she cut sugar out of her diet her health did a 180-degree turnaround and she felt better than she ever had in her life. That prompted her to do research into what exactly refined sugar is and how it impacts the body, which she shares in the rest of the book.
I liked it — it was one of the things that inspired me to embark on my own “Saint Diet” which had such a big impact on my life — and, from my personal experience, I believe that some people have a physical makeup that leaves them much more sensitive to refined sugar than others. But she definitely does take an extreme position on the subject, and it will probably seem overboard to some people, especially those who haven’t had personal experience with something like this. If you’re looking for inspiration to cut sugary junk food out of your diet, though, this is the book for you!
Whew! There are my thoughts on a few of the books I’ve read in the past few months. Anyone else have any thoughts on these books? Any other books to recommend? What have you been reading lately?