An idea for Sunday
A while back I read a thought-provoking post by Ouiz (one of my MegaMom interviewees) in which she mentioned an interesting idea she got from the How-To Book of the Mass: before Mass, she prays to ask God to help her hear a single word or phrase that she’s supposed to take with her and ponder throughout the day. She said that God has answered this prayer every time.
I was intrigued, so I tried it.
In my typical ADD, scattered way, my “prayer” was more like thinking that I would like to do that thing that Ouiz did the day before Mass, and then completely forgetting about it after that. So I was caught off guard when I was kneeling in Mass the next day, and during the Consecration a phrase I’ve heard every single Sunday since I began attending Catholic churches hit me like a ton of bricks:
A death he freely accepted.
I suddenly remembered my little prayer, and there was no question that this was the phrase I was meant to hear. Normally I would analyze something like this to death, focusing on a bunch of other phrases after that, wondering which one I was supposed to meditate on or if this whole thing was all in my head — but this time there was no doubt. That was my phrase, and God wanted me to think about it.
As I lay in bed that night, I rolled it over and over in my mind.
A death.
God died. God…died. God — the author of all that is, the Force behind everything from love to oceans to supernovae — experienced death.
He freely accepted.
In his human form, he felt pain, experienced dread, wished it could be some other way. He could have gotten out of it. But he didn’t. He gave up everything, and he gave it up for us. Without complaint. About to experience the most painful, unfair, unjust, undeserved act in the history of the universe, he accepted it without even an utterance of the type of complaining I do when I feel like I have too much laundry to do.
This ended up being a powerful meditation that gave me a lot of important food for thought, specifically in areas that I most needed to work on (ahem, complaining about even the smallest sacrifices).
I thought I’d share in case anyone else finds it interesting. Every time I’ve prayed for this since then, I have received an equally clear, helpful answer. Each Sunday now I look forward to seeing what new word or phrase I’ll be given to ponder throughout the week.
This time last year…
I have a house full of young ladies this afternoon, which limits my time for blog posting today. I’m going to use a tip I saw on Daily Blog Tips and use existing content to create a new post. So, in case I don’t finish the other new post I was working on today, here’s a little trip down memory lane:
What I was writing about this time last year…
- A well-worn apron
- Seeking God before seeking the snooze button
- When your husband/wife is an atheist
- “Would you kids be quiet! I’m trying to seek God’s will here!”
- What is more terrifying than a scorpion?
- Great writing tips for bloggers
- You first
- Talking to your kids about death
- Also, this is when I was doing the MegaMom Interview series with moms of large families. Some of my favorites:
- Milehimama’s story
- Hope’s story
- “Children are never a mistake” (don’t miss the last part of this one)
OK, back to my guests. Hopefully I’ll have a new post up later. 
MegaMom Interviews: Ouiz on having help
It’s been a while since I’ve posted a MegaMom Interview, so I’m delighted to share some more of Ouiz’s thoughts on parenting a large family. Be sure to check out Ouiz’s blog, Chez Ouiz, and if you’ve missed any of the other MegaMom Interviews you can find the archives here.
I asked:
Are you able to handle it all on your own, or do you rely on outside help from family or other caregivers?
She answered:
So far, I’ve done it solo. Parents and in-laws are too far away, unfortunately! I tried hiring someone to watch the babies so I could homeschool at the beginning, but that just never worked out…too stressful for me!
I don’t want to paint some sort of rosy picture — that I’m just gliding through this whole experience with no difficulty. There are days when I seriously wonder if I can handle one more minute emotionally!
Biggest help: getting on my knees every morning and consciously telling Jesus that I need His grace to get me through this day, or I will fall flat on my face. “If You do not give me the grace that I need to be a good Mom, Lord, I will fail You…and them…so miserably. You know what it’s like to be pulled at from all sides, and there were days that You wanted to run away from it all too. So be with me, Lord, and show me how to do this.”
Second biggest help: a very understanding husband who gives me a lot of support, and a great network of friends that I can call. Without them, I would have gone insane years ago.
I asked:
What is one thing you’ve learned over your years as a mother that you wish you’d known from the beginning?
She answered:
That feeling overwhelmed and stressed out is OK…that trying to attain the “picture perfect household” in a sea of kids is impossible…that you simply CANNOT do this without the Lord’s grace, and it’s ridiculous to try…and that it’s crucial to focus on what’s truly important.
Other than that, I would stress the need for a great support group — people you can call when you need someone to pray for you before you completely lose it!
Huge thanks to Ouiz and all the other moms who have taken the time to participate in these interviews!
MegaMom Interviews: "I could never do that!"
Hope, a mother of eight, has once again been kind enough to answer questions about life with lots of children. Be sure to check out her blog Mothers of Many Saints for more insights, and you can see the rest of the MegaMom Interviews here.
I asked:
Q: What would you say to women who look at how many children you have and think, “I could never do that, it would be too (physically / mentally / financially) hard”?
She responded:
I hear this all the time. I hear this from people who say that they couldn’t do the mothering that a large family demands, and generally I just give an encouraging, “Sure you could!” Some just say it, because it’s something to say, with no real consideration or care about inviting a new life into their family. Sometimes, though, I hear it from ladies at Church, who perhaps are truly struggling with the question of adding another soul to their family.
Recently, a woman who is an acquaintance, approached me at a church function, and the first thing she said was, “Are there going to be any more?” I looked at her quizzically, wondering at first if she was referring to the on-stage music or the festival itself, as if she was asking if there would be more music or another festival, but I quickly realized she was asking if there would be anymore children. I said, “Sure, maybe, only God knows.” This about knocked the socks off this mother of three. I guess because I don’t have it all planned out. As we talked I could tell that mothering and the question of following Church teaching regarding marriage was a struggle for her.
The state of being open to life in your marriage does not mean that you start off with having it all together. I mean, we had two children before we even had an income. When we started our family we were young, poor, and still had a lot of learning to do. At the beginning we hardly would have thought we would be where we are today — with eight kids, and we certainly were not “ready” by the world’s standards. But God has blessed us with each baby. The babies come just one at time, and with each we have grown and learned in many ways. If we had stopped at two or three, I would still think I couldn’t do eight. Just like I hear about families with twelve plus children and I think, “Wow, there is no way I could do that!”
A question I would ask myself and anyone else who thinks they couldn’t do it is, “Why not?” Is it impatience? Pray for patience and find practical ways to learn patience. Is it finances? Maybe a better job can be found or better budgeting can be practiced. Is it health? Learn how to be healthy and develop good habits. Is it disorganization? Learn how to instill order in your life. Is it a struggling marriage or unruly children? Learn how to fortify these relationships. If you do these things, you will see blessings in your life, blessings that prepare you to open your heart and home to just one more.
The point would be to learn to be content in every circumstance, trust in God, and keep striving for holiness.
A big thanks to Hope for taking the time to put together such a beautiful response!